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If you don't see the answer to your question below, please email me directly at

Section Title

  • Are Counselling and Therapy the same thing?
    Counselling is usually focused on a specific issue for a limited amount of time while therapy helps you understand yourself and your patterns of thought, feelings, and behaviours. Therapy and Counselling are often used interchangeably, but there are some key differences between them. Counselling involves working with a mental health counsellor or clinical mental health counsellor on a specific issue for a limited amount of time. For example, counselling can help you if you’re having problems with your marriage. You can see a marriage counsellor to learn how to improve things between you and your spouse. Or counselling can help you if you have difficulty managing stress and want guidance on tools you can use when you are stressed out. Usually, counselling focuses on a specific issue for a limited amount of time. Therapy can be more long-term and focuses on you as an individual — how you see yourself and the world, your thoughts, and your behaviours, as well as the underlying patterns of why you do the things you do. For example, if you were suffering from depression, you and your mental health therapist can explore how depression impacts your everyday life and how to develop better coping strategies so that you can feel better. You usually go to therapy sessions on a more long-term basis. Source: Mental Health Match. (n.d.). What is the difference between therapy and counselling? Mental Health Match. Retrieved February 20, 2023, from
  • What is your cancellation policy?
    Steven Butler, The BFT will send appointment reminders for your session, however it is your responsibility to keep track of your appointments. Clients are expected to notify if they will be late for an appointment. I also offer the ability to change your session to phone/virtual should you be unable to attend in person for any reason. If you cannot attend your appointment, notify Steven Butler as soon as possible by emailing or calling 1 (506) 497-6090 or If you do not provide notification within 24 hours or fail to show up for your scheduled appointment time, you will be charged as outlined: No-Show Appointment: A full session rate ($150) will be charged. Late Cancel (Less than 24 hours' notice): A half-session rate ($75) will be charged. This allows us to offer the appointment to another client who is waiting. Thank you for your understanding. All past outstanding balances must be paid before booking a new appointment. This includes past attended sessions, late cancellations or no-show fees.
  • If I have insurance, will you directly bill my insurance company?
    I most commonly direct bill Blue Cross and St. Thomas University insurance plans. I may be able to direct bill your insurance plan using Telus eClaims. This is not a guarantee. Please click the image below to learn more about Telus eClaims. If I am unable to direct bill your insurance plan, you will have to pay the total cost upfront and submit your receipt directly to your insurance company (i.e., online portal, smartphone app, case worker, etc.). Please note that it is your responsibility to ensure your policy covers "clinical counsellors, psychotherapists, or licensed counselling therapists". It is also your responsibility to keep track of how much benefit you are using and how much remains.
  • What forms of payment do you accept?
    My preferred payment method is e-transfer, to I am also able to accept Visa-debit, credit card, or PayPal.
  • When should I book my session?
    Typically appointments are booked two weeks to one month ahead of time, though this can fluctuate. My calendar is always current, so if you are unable to find an appointment, it is because I am already booked for that time. Occasionally, last-minute spots will become available. Please contact me directly if you would like to be made aware of any last-minute availability as I do keep a cancellation list. To book your appointment, please click this link, click any of the "Book Now" buttons on my website, or reach out to me at
  • Do you offer evening appointments? I don't see them listed online...
    Yes, though due to high demand, these times are booked well in advance and are not available through my online booking system. Please email me at if this is your desired timeframe and I will do my best to find suitable availability, though I am unable to make any guarantees.
  • What do I do if I or someone I know is in crisis?
    Steven Butler, The Big Friendly Therapist is not available on an urgent or emergency basis. If you are in distress, in life-threatening need, or concerned about the safety of yourself or the safety of others, you are required to contact the appropriate authorities. These can include: Calling 911 if you or someone you know is in imminent danger, or going to your local Emergency Room NEW NATIONAL RESOURCE Call or text 9-8-8 to get connected with a first responder if you are thinking of, or have a plan to self-harm or are at risk of suicide. Toll free and 24/7! Saint John Specific Resources Saint John Mobile Mental Health @ 1-888-811-3664 Just Us Inc. offers “barrier free” (i.e., free and low-cost) counselling. Please call 506-651-1239 for more information. Domestic Violence/Mental Health ​Domestic Violence Outreach @ (506) 632-5616 Hestia House @ (506) 634-7571 24-hour Distress Line: 506.634.7570 Text Only Option: 506.566.6667 New Brunswick Resources CHIMO - 24/7 phone line @ 1-800-667-5005 New Brunswick Addiction and Mental Health Helpline - 24/7 phone line @ 1-866-355-5550 Courage Centre - 24/7 phone line @ (506) 533-9100 Call 211 to get connected with other local resources (ask about One-at-a-Time (OAAT) Counselling) Fredericton Mobile Mental Health @ (506) 453-2132 Moncton Mobile Mental Health @ 866-771-7760 Upper River Valley Area Mobile Mental Health @ 1-888-667-0444 Miramichi Mobile Mental Health @ (506) 623-3333 evisit from 8:00am - 8:00pm 7 days a week with a valid New Brunswick Medicare Card Canada Wide Resources Kids Help Phone @ 1-800-668-6868 Get support right now by texting CONNECT to 686868 RiseUp - Text RISE to 686868 A national, bilingual service for Black youth run by Kids Help Phone. Available 24/7. Trans Lifeline @ 1-877-330-6366 Black Youth Helpline @ 1-833-294-8650 National helpline for Black youth and their families (available from 9am - 10pm EST) Hope For Wellness - 1-855-242-3310 24/7 phone line for First Nations, Inuit, and Métis Peoples Click here to access an online chat Black Mental Health Canada Providing culturally safe, accessible and affordable Mental Health Care to diverse Black communities in Canada. Other Mental Health and Crisis Support
  • Do you currently have a waitlist?
    Yes. I currently have a waitlist for new clients. At this time, I am prioritizing clients who are needing letters of support for gender affirming surgeries or HRT. To be added to my waitlist, please email me at Please Note: I am unable to give a concrete timeframe into when you will be seen. Wait times will vary.
  • What is Queer Theory?
    Queer theory is a way of looking at the world that challenges traditional ideas about gender and sexuality. It's all about questioning and breaking free from the usual labels and categories society puts on people.

In a nutshell, queer theory is about celebrating the beautiful complexity of human experiences and helping us understand that there's so much more to people than just a simple "one-size-fits-all" label. It's a fresh perspective that encourages inclusivity, empathy, and acceptance for everyone.
  • What is Gender Affirming Care?
    Gender-affirming care is a way of supporting and respecting a person's gender identity, making them feel valued, understood, and validated.

This care might include medical treatments like hormone therapy or surgeries if that's what the person needs to feel more like themselves. But it's not just about medical stuff; it's also about using the right name and pronouns, creating safe spaces, and making sure people feel heard and seen. Ultimately, gender-affirming care is about promoting happiness, mental well-being, and confidence in folks, no matter how they identify.
  • What is Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)?
    Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is a form of psychotherapy that was originally developed to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It was created by Francine Shapiro in the late 1980s and has since been used to address a wide range of psychological issues beyond PTSD. The main goal of EMDR is to help individuals process distressing memories and experiences that have become "stuck" or unprocessed in the brain. These unresolved memories can lead to emotional and behavioural difficulties in the present. EMDR aims to alleviate the emotional distress associated with traumatic memories, allowing the individual to integrate those memories more adaptively. The therapy involves eight phases: 1. History-taking and treatment planning: The therapist gathers information about the individual's history and identifies target memories for processing. 2. Preparation: The therapist helps the individual develop coping skills and relaxation techniques to manage any distress that may arise during the therapy sessions. 3. Assessment: The target memory is identified, and the emotions, negative beliefs, and physical sensations associated with it are explored. 4. Desensitization: The individual focuses on the target memory while simultaneously engaging in bilateral stimulation, which can be achieved through side-to-side eye movements, tapping, or auditory cues. This bilateral stimulation is thought to mimic the rapid eye movement that occurs during REM sleep and helps to process the memory. 5. Installation: Positive beliefs and self-statements are integrated to replace the negative beliefs associated with the target memory. 6. Body scan: The individual scans their body to identify any residual tension or discomfort and processes any associated memories. 7. Closure: At the end of each session, the therapist ensures the individual is stable and provides relaxation techniques if needed. 8. Reevaluation: In subsequent sessions, the therapist checks the progress made and reassesses the target memory to ensure it has been properly processed. EMDR is considered an evidence-based therapy and has been found to be effective in treating PTSD and other trauma-related conditions. It is also used for anxiety, depression, phobias, and other emotional difficulties. However, it may not be suitable for everyone, and it's essential to work with a qualified and experienced EMDR therapist to determine if it's the right approach for your specific needs.
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